A LAST GIFT

There are many things in the world, and any of them could easily be admired and appreciated; however, I doubt that anyone likes the concept of funerals, and personally, I find them repugnant and feel a great aversion towards them. It seems that I can't find any meaning in them, as this ceremony, if it can even be called that, seems very flat and devoid of significance to me. Despite being carried out with the aim of honoring the recently deceased, it appears to be more focused on sharing anecdotes about them and taking a bit of the spotlight.

Unfortunately, I will have to attend one again, although it's really the first time in a long time. Once again, the only difference between this funeral and the previous one seems to be the location because, as if it were a tasteless joke, the cause of death between the previous funeral and this one is the same: a heart attack. It gives me a strange sense of sorrow, but not quite sadness, when observing the families of the deceased. But, to be honest, I can't fully grasp it, as we are taught from childhood that the concept of death is a universal and natural occurrence that will eventually happen to any living being. I don't understand why people cry over a reality that is impossible to change.

The place was filled with tears; it almost seemed like they were keeping pace with the candle wax, to the point where it was somewhat suffocating. But all that stopped mattering when I saw a woman just like me. Unlike the others, she seemed to view the situation with indifference or as if it didn't affect her enough to express the feelings of sadness that the others were experiencing. Quickly, almost by instinct, I approached her to talk, but I felt a strange tug on my upper part, as if it were a hug. It turned out to be a man I didn't know, but he was so fragile due to the emotional moment. His grip was as strong as his sobbing, and I couldn't escape it, so I had to wait for him to finish squeezing me like a towel.

"Are you okay, sir?"
"Yes, I'm feeling better, thanks to you."
"I'm glad. Well, I guess we say goodbye."
"Hey, wait, young man. Who are your parents?"
"I'm Migue's parents..."

He quickly interrupted me and pulled me by the arm to introduce me to his family. I suppose, based on his reaction, he and my father are very close to each other. After greeting the whole family of the stranger, he introduced me to his daughter, who turned out to be the woman I had been watching with a distant gaze.

I stayed talking with her for a long time as a way to distract myself during the funeral. We discovered some things in common, but there were more things that differed in our personalities compared to what we agreed on. Oddly, instead of disliking me, I think this factor brought me some peace, because if it were the opposite, it would mean this girl was just like anyone else.

At the end of the funeral, the girl asked me if I enjoyed the funeral, and she began to talk about her perspective on funerals and how beautiful they can be. She argued that she didn't see funerals as something empty and lacking, as I did, but rather as something beautiful, lived, and expressive, where people gather to share their memories with the deceased in order to conclude their relationship.

I can understand those simple words, but to be completely honest, I am completely indifferent to the meaning of funerals, as I have never experienced a feeling as deep and intense as losing someone I care about. Perhaps that's the main reason for my great indifference.

As I explained these thoughts, the girl simultaneously grabbed my hand to lead us to the area where the deceased lay. We stood there for a long time as if we both had a desire, where the deceased would suddenly start jumping with joy in their arms just because their joke was a resounding success. But contrary to what we thought, they remained as still as an object.

Honestly, it surprises me a lot that something like death exists and how it is so universal that even the deadliest and most feared creature can achieve it.

But, unlike me, my new friend seemed more emotional when she looked at that coffin, and then she quickly grabbed a candle near the reception and returned to the place where the body lay.

I reacted instantly and emphasized that, whatever her intentions, she shouldn't leave that candle there immediately because it could cause a serious accident if she wasn't careful. In a way that was too stubborn, she started reassuring me, and I trusted her that she wouldn't do anything wrong.

She began to place the candle in a peculiar position, threatening to burn the coffin in case of a sudden movement. I questioned her about her erratic behavior. As I did, she lay down on the coffin next to the candle, and I instinctively tried to grab her to prevent her from falling, but she got in the way. Then, she placed her hand on the side of the coffin, indicating that I should sit next to her if I wanted to hold the candle. So, I cautiously sat down. I was surprised that everyone ignored our actions as if they didn't pose a potential danger.

For a while, there was a continuous silence that echoed through every wall of the building. Due to the discomfort, I decided to ask her about her motives, but she quickly told me to be quiet and redirected me with her eyes to look up. It was a great sight; a solar eclipse seemed to be positioning itself above us as if it wanted to tell us something.

The candle suddenly began to enlarge, and concerned, I tried to remove it, but once again the girl grabbed my arm, preventing me from moving the candle. We stared into each other's eyes for a long time, and I gave up the struggle.

"You can do whatever you want with that candle; I suppose it's no longer my concern to take care of you."

"I don't understand..."

"Of course, you don't; you've been avoiding the issue since this funeral began."

"I don't understand..."

Annoyed, she took my hands and the candle.

"You have two options: hold the candle and wait for the wax to drip, or throw it into the coffin."

"But... do I have to choose only those two options? I really don't like either of them."

"It's your choice."

I tried to hold the candle, but it was too painful to bear. So, I threw it, and, with tears in my eyes from the wounds caused by the candle, I decided to sit with my arms crossed, just waiting for the fire to spread and turn the place into ashes.